英語笑話爆笑帶翻譯 篇1
河上漂流(中英)
A man is walking past a travel agents office when he notices a billboard announcing, "4 day cruise down the Murray River $40 all inclusive.”
一個男人路過旅行社時，看到一個廣告欄上面寫著“順著墨累河漂流四天，全部費用只需40美元”。
ImPssed by the low price, he races into the shop, slaps $40 onto the counter and announces, "I' m here for the Murray cruise.” Quick as a wink, the travel agent whips out a baseball bat and knocks him unconscious.
面對如此低價的誘惑，他大步走進旅行社把40美元往桌上一拍，然后說:“我報名墨累河之游。”眨眼間，旅行社的店員抽出一根棒球棍，一下就把那個人打昏了。
When the man wakes, he finds himself tied to a floating log and drifting down the river. After a time, he notices another man in same Pdicament on the other side of the river.
當那個人醒來之后，發現自己被捆在一個木筏上，正沿著河水往下漂呢。過了一會兒在河的另一邊，他看到一個和他處境一樣的人。
"$40 Murray cruise?" he calls out.
"40美元墨累河之游?”他喊到。
"Yep!" says the man on the other side.
“是呀!”那人答道。
"I'll bet you we don't even get breakfast,”he yells.
“我打賭我們還沒吃早飯呢。”他喊道。
"Well，”calls the other man, “we did last year.”
“對，”另一個人說，“我們去年吃過了。”
英語笑話爆笑帶翻譯 篇2
給丈夫最好的警告(中英)
My husband, not happy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so that he would be able to monitor my moods. When I’m in a good mood it turns green. When I' m in a bad mood it leaves a big red mark on his forehead.
我的丈夫對我時常波動的情緒很不高興。所以那天他給我買了一個心情戒指，那樣他就可以從戒指上看出我的心情。當我的心情好的`時候，那個戒指就會變成綠色。當我的心情不好的時候，在我丈夫的額頭上就會留下一大塊紅色的戒指印。
英語笑話爆笑帶翻譯 篇3
實話實說(中英)
As our plane made it's landing at O' Hare, the flight attendant began her "welcome and thanks" speech.
當我們的飛機在歐海爾降落時，飛機的機組人員開始了她的“歡迎和感謝”的演講。
"Welcome to Chicago, where the local time is 6: 15. It has been our pleasure to serve you today. We hope you have enjoyed your flight. We know you have a choice of bankrupt airlines, and we thank you for choosing United.”
“歡迎來到芝加哥，當地時間是六點十五分。今天能夠給你們提供服務是我們的榮幸。我希望你們對此次飛行感到滿意。雖然你們選擇了一家破產的航空公司，但是我們還是感謝你們選擇了聯合航空公司。”
英語笑話爆笑帶翻譯 篇4
She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "I've bought two Psents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I can't wait until that day. One Psent is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette(小雕像) for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"
Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "I'd better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange Psents with each other."
有個女人給她的丈夫買了生日禮物。
她很激動，并且急于要告訴她的丈夫。她說：“親愛的，我買了兩樣東西給你做生日禮物。我現在就要告訴你，因為我等不得到那一天才說。一件禮物是一個地墊，可以放在我的梳妝臺前。另一件是一個青銅的小雕像，可以放在客廳的壁爐架上”她還說：“好啦，你準備給我買什么呢?”
她的丈夫想了一會就說：“我最好是給你買一個刮胡刀和幾條領帶。這樣我們就可以互相交換禮物了。”
英語笑話爆笑帶翻譯 篇5
A private didn't notice a young lieutenant and failed to salute him. The lieutenant said sternly, "You did not salute me. For this you must immediately salute one hundred times."
Just then the general came up. When he saw the poor private about to begin, he exclaimed, "What's all this?"
The lieutenant explained, "This ignoramus(無知的人) failed to salute me. I'm making his salute one hundred times as a punishment.”
"Quite right," replied the general smiling, "But do not forget, sir, that upon each occasion you are to salute return."
有個士兵沒有注意到一個年輕的陸軍中尉，沒有向他敬禮。中尉很嚴厲地對那個士兵說：“你沒有向我敬禮，因此你要馬上敬100個禮。”
這時候將軍過來了。他看到那個可憐的士兵就要開始敬禮時，就大聲問道：“這是怎么啦?”
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中尉解釋說：“這個蠢貨沒有向我敬禮，我就罰他馬上向我敬一百個禮。”
將軍笑著說：“完全正確。不過，老弟，別忘了他向你每敬一個禮，你都要回禮的啊!”
